When I sat down at my desk this morning, I did not think I would be asking this question. After all, it seems like an easy question to answer, right? We have sex because we enjoy it.
However, it seems that for a lot of people that isn’t the case. Our motivations to have sex are all different. So, after I’ve had a look at the reasons people give for getting down and dirty, you can let me know what your reasons are.
Sex is good for the brain
This was all inspired by the news that sex can actually make your brain work better and more effectively. Yes, yet another study into our sex lives has been conducted.
For whatever reason, scientists and curious researchers cannot leave it alone. They want to know exactly what the benefits of sex are so that we have plenty of excuses to get it on.
Anyway, this study looks at the brain activity and intelligence of elderly people. The results have shown that there is a connection between your sex life and your intelligence. Before you go running off for a shag, it isn’t enough to get you a degree at University.
However, not only did those who had a greater interest in sex have more intelligence and higher brain activity, but they also showed better processing power, better memory, and better cognitive functioning. That’s a win for sex and science!
The worrying part
This is good news, right? Having more sex makes you more intelligent and there’s absolutely nothing that could be bad about that… right?
Wrong. There are some worrying things we’re discovering after this news, and it isn’t the study itself that is causing them. In fact, how people are reacting to this news is the worrying part.
One newspaper wanted to get a little interactivity into their article by asking their readers just why they have sex. The options given were a little worrying. Here were the answers in order of appearance:
“Because my spouse wants to”, “Because I’m well clev”, “To improve my IQ”, “To lose weight”, “Because it’s fun”, and finally “I don’t”. Yes, having sex “because it’s fun” was the fifth of six options, just above not having sex at all.
Why have the other options?
In reality, we should only be having sex because we enjoy it. After all, sex is a very personal and fun thing when done right, so why would we do it for any other reason than our own satisfaction? While the most selected answer was “because it’s fun”, a worrying 32% of people gave other reasons.
The second best answer “because my spouse wants to”, received 14% of the votes (when I last checked). I can understand the reasoning behind this answer. People have different sex drives and sometimes you simply cannot satisfy each other. In a previous relationship, the guy I was dating just couldn’t get me off. When we had sex, it was all about satisfying him instead of both of us.
However, the other answers are worrying. 8% of people chose “because I’m well clev” and a further 5% said they wanted “to improve [their] IQ”. Whether this is actually true or people have simply chosen the answer they think is funniest is another matter entirely, but you can guarantee some out there will be jumping under the sheets so they can win at Trivial Pursuit or Scrabble later.
While no-one chose the option of “to lose weight”, 5% said that they simply don’t have sex. It isn’t uncommon for people to fall into a sex routine and for that routine to stop altogether, but the fact that 5% of people aren’t having sex is a little worrying.
Sex for fun
So, if you suspect your partner is having sex for the wrong reasons and no longer enjoying it, what can you do to change that?
Think about who the focus is on during sex. Is it you or is it your partner? It could be that, no matter how much moaning and groaning she does, she simply isn’t getting off and is faking it to make you feel better.
Take the time to try foreplay, licking her pussy and stroking your fingers in and out until her entire body flushes with orgasm.
Have you fallen into a routine? If so, it is time to change it up. Try some new positions or even just have sex in a different room. Sex doesn’t have to just be in the bedroom, so why not fuck on the sofa or against the kitchen counter to make it a little hotter?
Now when I have sex it is because I want to, but what about you? Are you guilty of only having sex because your partner wants it, or do you have other reasons? Let us know on the Escort Scotland forum, or by leaving a comment in the box below.
Since then she has gained a fine reputation with her blogs on sex advice, sexual health and amusing news stories from around the globe. She is also a campaigner for the rights of sex workers from all over the world.
In her spare time, Lara keeps herself active by going running, and is something of a film buff. She also loves to go travelling.
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