Sex in TV and film is complicated. It isn’t easy to put together a scene that seems realistic and helps to progress the story all at the same time. They also have to toe the line between being edgy and just turning the sex scenes into porn.
If you, like me, were unfortunate enough to see ‘The Room’ and those awful Tommy Wiseau sex scenes (sorry Tommy) then you’ll know what bad scenes look like. You might have a very clear idea in your head about making these scenes work. If so, HBO are looking for intimacy coordinators, and it could be you!
Sex scenes in TV and film
It seems that TV shows and films lately have either been avoiding sex scenes like the plague or they have been putting really intense and long scenes in their shows. I can’t think of any right now where sex isn’t shown in a graphic way. Of course, this doesn’t always mean that the sex we see is good sex.
I’ve already mentioned ‘The Room’. If you’ve seen it, you’ll already know what I’m talking about. If you haven’t, save yourself the trouble and just don’t watch. At one point he seems to be having sex with her belly button, which I don’t believe is the point of the scene. Don’t just take my word for it. Jennifer Wood created a list of the 25 most laughable sex scenes in movie history, and ‘The Room’ made it to number 19.
There are plenty of other awful ones, but then there are also some amazing ones out there. I’m a huge fan of ‘Sense8’. I love the show, and I’d be lying if I said the sex wasn’t a part of it. We get some intense and diverse sex going on in the show, and it is all shot and coordinated so beautifully. What’s not to love? You can see one of the scenes below.
What do intimacy coordinators do?
Up until writing this article I’d never even heard of an intimacy coordinator before. I was just as much in the dark about it as you probably are right now. But it seems that intimacy coordinators are even more in demand now than they ever were before, and people from all around are eager to get this job.
So what is an intimacy coordinator and what does their job entail? It is easier to understand the job if we think of them like stunt coordinators, but for sex scenes. They watch over the scene, ensuring that everyone involved is safe. This means both physically and psychologically. They’ll converse with the staff on the film to make sure everything is okay.
The #MeToo movement helped to highlight how important this role is. It ensures that everyone involved in these scenes is treated with respect and that they aren’t asked to do anything that they are comfortable with. It ensures a level playing field for all actors and makes for a great working environment. What’s not to love about that?
HBO is hiring!
Emily Meade is the 29 year-old star in HBO’s ‘The Deuce’. Considering the subject of the series is sex workers, it made the already sensitive topic of sex even more so. In an interview, she stated that she was aware she’d been ignoring her own discomfort for years on set and wanted that to change.
She approached the creators of the show and asked for an advocate. They hired an intimacy coordinator and it changed Meade’s working life. She explained that it was like having “a mother or sister on set” to help look out for her and ensure her concerns regarding scenes were being listened to.
In the beginning it was simply an experiment, but HBO found that it was a huge success. As a result, they have decided they want to hire intimacy coordinators for all of their shows. They are hiring! This means that you could actually get a job helping to coordinate things on the set of things like Game of Thrones and Westworld.
Would you take the job?
To begin with, it might seem like a very easy job to do. However, it is far more complicated than it seems. It is a job that needs the right person for the role, as Emily Meade highlights in her interview on HBO about the role.
Do you think that it is something you would like to do? Does it seem like the kind of job you’d love? I want to hear from you. Let me know if this ticks all of your boxes in the comments below!
Since then she has gained a fine reputation with her blogs on sex advice, sexual health and amusing news stories from around the globe. She is also a campaigner for the rights of sex workers from all over the world.
In her spare time, Lara keeps herself active by going running, and is something of a film buff. She also loves to go travelling.
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